Moving forward

I honestly didn’t know what moving forward meant until about 3 months ago. I would try to hold onto everyone and every little memory, even if it was bad or negative. But some times people come in stages of your life and when you outgrow those stages its best to leave it behind even if that means leaving some old acquaintances there as well.

I started 9 grade at a brand new high school. I left that high school holding so much anger inside and for the people as well but in a way it was holding me back and now I have no reason to because I know that that’s not the person that I would like to be and that I don’t need something not as meaningful held in my heart. When I was able to let go of everything that was when I was able to find myself and real except myself. That was when I loved myself and my flaws.

Later after legging go I soon felt that maybe it was a mistake because there wasn’t many people around me, maybe it was because the friends that are close and lifelong are limited. Maybe it was the fact that I was reaching out to anyone new. Little did I know that it would change my 11 grade year when I finally let go of someone I thought was close but actually toxic and I gained an entire team of people who are incredibly amazing inspiring funny well grounded people.  Whom I was honored to get the time to know everyone and spend everyday with such incredible souls. They who have thought me so much and where I found the depth of my strength.

Its times like this where I realize that moving on and legging go can be pretty scary at times, but when you look back on it… It just seems like another step in my path on becoming a humble human being instead of a random leap in the dark.

Spreading a Message

Living in a world where there are many languages, sometimes it can get tough when traveling and you have that wall. Even then you still put an effort in to get across what you’re saying correctly. So how come when you don’t have that wall, we don’t try to communicate? Is it because people will think it’s weird that you struck up a conversation? Then again, when will you see those people again. And the best part of this, is it can all start with a Smile.

A simple smile that can make someone feel recognized and important where no words were exchanged. A smile that is so meaningful because it is universal. You don’t have to know a language to accept a smile that is given. Once the smile is shared you will realise it creates an effect on that person and they will pass it on and it creates a chain of others continuously passing a simple act of kindness and love.

Starting Fresh

The New Year is finally here, this is that time of year where everyone takes a second to figure out there new year resolution. Some have the goal to stop smoking, lose weight or to focus on work. I wanted to take a moment to really think about what I wanted since lately I’ve been so stressed. Then it hit me, this year I wanna focus on me.  I mean this in the way of surrounding myself with good people and always having a positive outlook even if I’m in the worst situation. I wanna focus on my writing and expressing myself and working on having a positive energy that flows to every person I meet. I also wanna focus on not letting others get to me with bad intentions, and letting goes of those who do. And if I am hurt by something I don’t want to send those energies to others. I wanna focus on falling in love with every part of myself, and expanding my thoughts and not being so hard on myself and stop over thinking everything. Lastly I wanna close this chapter whether it’s unfinished or some parts have not been written yet, because I want to start new. Fresh mindset and fresh soul. This ties in with letting go. Having closer to finally move on and not have anything to hold you back so now you can pour all of your energy into what you love and wanna accomplish.

I wish you all a happy New Year and sending all my love and positivity your way and make this year count.

Mind Blown

I had just recently was talking to a very close friend of mind and just saying things that had opened my mind and would like to share since it had to deal with their situation. Although I was sharing my own insights it seemed like the longer I expanded on the idea the more and more I opened my own mind up. It’s hard to put it into words since it is difficult to wrap my head around it and try to explain it to my self. My friend asked me how I keep an open mind and if I could share on how to do it. But I’m not even sure because it’s almost like a feeling. Maybe that has to deal with the fact that it can help/change your feeling because it’s like taking a look onto things such as life with new eyes. Almost like your viewing something through someone else eyes. In a way its kinda like a fresh start for your mind. I could go on and on. But at the same time I can’t because trying to explain how to do it is telling you to explain to me how to love. You can’t tell someone how to love like you would to ride a bike or bake a cake. It almost kinda happens, whither its all at once or in phases.

This got me thinking to when having an open  mind what does it affect the most?

I do think differently because I try to look at all sides of the aspect. I do feel differently because I am thinking differently. I do act differently because I am feeling differently because of my feeling. Its like everything is all one. This is where my mind is blown. It’s all flow. It’s crazy how everything in our life kinda inter connects with everything. Totally made me realize how important everything is and how webbed up everything is.

Tell me how having an open mind affects you?

Stuck in a funk

I will go through phases where I have so much inspiration and creativity that my energy is bouncing off the walls. Then once I’m on a high of all the positive energy and creativity it starts to fade. My mind stresses out because I get so excited about all the things I can accomplish that I feel like I need to do more and get more done, that I soon start to lose all that motivation.

I don’t know what it is but I feel almost drained and unmotivated. To tell the truth I’m not sure how to get out of these phases. Because something random will happen where I will speak to someone I don’t know, and they tell me something wise or I stumble upon a YouTube video where they speak about a topic such as flow or being energized or even their views on things. I get this kick of energy and there it is, my motivation. It’s almost as if something clicks into my brain and I want to do everything again and get things done. That’s when it seems like everything falls into place, and not only in my personal life but it seems like good things happen to the people I care about and are close to. I think a lot of this has to deal with having an open mind. And not over thinking everything since this tends to stress me out. That’s why I fell in love with writing, it was a way to bring me closer with my self and to write what I feel with out that judgment weight onto me. And I feel every time I get that kick of inspiration and I want to write it down whither it’s for my blog or for personal reasons its great to reflect on that for when I am in my funk, because I know I can get things done even if its one thing at a time and may take a little while longer.

Flow and friends

This topic is what I call a puzzle. But it’s something where you can sit there and think about what goes next and how to do that or even how this got into your life, but I don’t have to know the answer to it.

For example the way people come into your life. And I don’t mean appearance or impression I just mean it’s crazy that when things happen someone can come into you life and make everything easier. Personally I have dealt with a lot in such a short span of time that I tend to freak out and have those days where it’s hard for me to get out of bed, but in all that chaos I made a beautiful friendship along the way. The way things flowed from being at such a low point and stuck in a funk to now having another supportive friend that has my back and makes those hard days not so hard anymore.

This bringing in my second topic “Flow”. You can always make things happen to a certain point, but when you push it farther it becomes this big ball of mess that you can’t control. Meaning sometimes it falls apart and what’s done is done and there isn’t anything you can do sometimes depending on the situation besides letting things fall to rest. Then there flow. Where it does truly make everything happen for a reason. It’s hard to try to explain this because even though flow is more of a way to describe pace. I feel it can be almost an emotion if that makes sense. Where you will do something and everything naturally links together and that feeling gives me such a high feeling because I’m so overwhelmed by the positivity.

This flow can also bring friendships, relationships and even new friends together. It’s crazy to have once seen everything everywhere and all over the place to then being settled. The easiest way I can explain is like snow globe. Once its shaken everything is all over the place and far from settling down, to then the snow sets and lands steadily.

Friends for life.

As we grow up and go through many things through life. Even though some friendship come to an end they still last forever, because you were able to experience opportunities together and build such amazing memories together.

Sometimes it’s hard to see a friendship fade because you were once so close, and shared everything from boy talk to advise on life. But it’s always important to stay positive. Thus meaning just stay grateful that you had a chance sharing that part of your life with them and that maybe in the future you’re bound to run into each other and cross paths. And strange enough when a friendship slowly starts to change and isn’t the same anymore you find yourself connecting with someone else. And I don’t mean his in a way that one friendship ends so just move on. I mean it in a way that you find yourself meeting someone who is going through the same things as you, or has the same interest or is just overall inspiring and fun to hang out with and you just really enjoy their company.

I just wanted to write a personal short poem about how I feel in which words can’t truly express.

Growing up you were by my side,

you were there for me when I was in doubt

You would help bring me up and build my pride.

Although things are different, and were on a different route

It’s okay to move on and find something else that works out.

People change and friend ships fade.

But our everlasting memories will always display,

that you were there for me through timeless infinity.

 

I hope you guys enjoyed this short poem. I want to start creating more hopefully in the future and get stronger at creating them.

Three quotes in Three days

So this will be a little different to some of the other blogs I have read where they have posted on 3 different days of 3 different quotes. Because I am busy most days and hard to find time to sit down and write im going to combine all 3 days into one piece with 3 different quotes of what I have realized over this week.

Starting off September has been the toughest month of my life, a lot has changed and its scary to see your life change so fast. One thing that someone has said to me which really did made me realize how truthful it is. “The time that you are going through is tough, but because you have gone through the worst everything else after will only get easier because you know your strong enough.”  I find this very accurate because when something happens to you or someone else you know the low has already come and from this point to now on, even when its hard to just keep a smile on your face you know you have a good support system and people there for you. And because you have been through those tough time you know your strong to get through everything else.

Now this brings me to my second quote. Which is something that I personally have to stop and think about sometimes. Which is “simply be in the moment”. Its hard sometimes where I know I tend to go through life almost as im watching myself doing things and not truly appreciating everything I am able to do. It’s important that when you are able to do something even as simple as a family dinner or event to just stop stressing about school, work, any activities and just be in that moment of talking and sharing stories with your family.

Lastly I think this is an important message and I didn’t realize it till a good friend of mine brought it up. It’s not a quote but take it as you will. To make this quote make sense I should give you a little back story, her family helps out with the foster system. Where when a kid needs to go to a home while in the system they can take care of them until they move on. And what she said really did open my eyes. Where you see these kids that have gone through so much stress and trouble it opens your eyes. She told me so many people say they wanna go to Africa to help, or go on a mission to help. But where we are where you are from and are right now needs help. Why wait till you can go to Africa or on a mission when you can help right now.

Open eyes, Open mind

There are cases in our life where we start to hit this bump, we get frustrated with our self’s and don’t know how to solve a problem. This problem could be an infinite of different things to some and could also be fewer to others. As I hit this bump I start to lose my creativity and shut myself down. I know I have a lot to do and have a dead line to do it, but it seems almost like a long shot at times. But then I think back to what my Mother says “take it one thing at a time”.

What if it’s not the fact that I have so much to do in such little time, what if it’s the fact I have a lot to do but don’t know how. I am kind of a stubborn person and wont just ask for help, unless I really need it. But why do we as people, do this? Are we to into our ego’s? Could it be that we just want people to know we always know what were doing? Or could it be the fact were just not being open-minded.

I know that when I get frustrated I shut myself down and everyone’s ideas with it. I can’t think what can I do, I think why can’t I do this. Which can make a huge difference.

Even though I truly believe sometimes all it takes is a bit of inspiration to motivate and keep a clear,open mind. This can be hard sometimes, and a bit confusing as well. What inspires me? How can I get motivated? How the hell can I get an open mind? But it’s simple what ever inspires you is most likely something that makes you happy, and I know when I’m happy that is what motivates me and when I’m motivated that’s when I’m ready to really get some work done. And then there are times like this, let me set the scene for you…

I’m taking a class in Psychology this year, and we had to analyze 3 different things in 2 different time periods or country’s. I wanted to analyze something no one else in my class was doing while staying original. I had come up with a few ideas but nothing a could really elaborate on. So I started to get irritated which lead to me shutting my mind down and then off. Any ideas I would receive from my parents I would refuse and get more frustrated. I set my work down knowing nothing can get done if im not going to corroborate, and continue the next day. When I had a fresh open mind I though back onto ideas as my mom gave me which were really superb, and something i could actually elaborate on. So I put together all my information and was able to turn in a strong presentation.

This would have been something that if I were to have staying frustrated and closed-minded, none of it would have been able to get done. I wanted my project to be refreshing and new. Which by opening my mind, opened my eyes and was able to turn in the material I knew I could achieve.